Sometimes I think I have it together. And then God lets me know I don't. I was asked to facilitate our ladies' Bible study at church this summer. I guess my desire for God's Word and my wish to have others know it overshadowed my lack of organizational skills in the mind of the sweet woman who asked me.
I thought I was doing pretty well. Until last night. Last night was our first night to meet. I had recruited group leaders. (Actually, God provided most of them! Go God!) I had shuffled and re-shuffled the groups until I was satisfied. I had typed out some instructions for the group leaders and a sheet of questions to ask next week. I had created a list of the ladies' names and which group they were in, as well as a list of each group by color. I had enlisted Paul to be home in plenty of time for me to be there at least half an hour early. I was feeling --dare I say it-- rather together. And I had done much of it while watching two extra children (for a total of six girls ages nine and under)!
Then, as I walked into church, I realized I forgot the name tags! The big jumbled box of name tags that I had also forgotten to put into neat bags according to their group. I also had forgotten my mobile phone. A very kind friend let me call Paul on her phone, and he agreed to bring up the forgotten name tags. (Living only 5 minutes away from church has its advantages!) As I was waiting, one of the group leaders reminded me that she had asked for certain ladies to be in her group. I had placed them together initially, but I forgot to write it down. So in all the shuffling and reshuffling this group got separated. Fortunately, it was early enough for me to do a quick re-reshuffling and put them back in her group. The messy box of name tags arrived, and some helpful women (who must have had the gifts of service and organization) helped arrange the name tags and facilitate registration.
Everyone settled into her group and it was time for me to give the introduction. (This is my favorite part. I really enjoy speaking to groups. Weird, huh?) Of course, the microphone had dead batteries. I enlisted the help of the woman who does this during the school year, and she suggested robbing the batteries from another microphone. They worked! I talked. The groups visited. We watched the video. I hope everyone left satisfied. Not satisfied in me or my performance. (Which was rather pitiful.) But satisfied in God. Looking forward to what He is going to do in their lives over the next few weeks. God is amazing. I trust Him to overcome all my deficiencies.
I think I'll be wary of feeling together any time soon. The only together I want is being together with Jesus. And that's the only together that matters!